The flirt????

I am sure glad that there are only a couple of you guys reading this!!!!  I have never been good at writing...I am sooo not good at this!  I talk much better than I write.  My memory is not too swift and I think I have a bit of my mom's 'rose-colored glasses' thing going on.  I seem to remember the good stuff and try to forget the bad.  Trying to put my story into words has been just plain HARD.  As I have read over all that I have written so far I feel more than a bit dense!  I have always considered myself fairly intelligent but...not so much I think.

When we moved to Northern Ca my husband took over all our finances.  Our small town does not have home postal delivery so all mail goes to the post office box.  My husband kindly picked up our mail daily and would never 'let me be bothered'.  We had been married for 15 years.  I trusted him completely.  I used to tell him that 'I trusted him with my life'.  And I did!!!

Law enforcement personnel seem to have a fatal flaw.  They have difficulty maintaining strong marriages.  For many reasons I suppose but mostly because of being unfaithful.  Over the course of our marriage every time my husband heard of another marriage ending he would always call me from wherever he was, tell me the news and ask me the question, "Are we okay?".  I would answer the same way every time,  "I'm okay....are we okay?"  I would smile and assure him that we were fine.

We had many close couples in our lives where the husband had just up and left their family, for seemingly no good reason.  My husband would get so angry at these men!  How awful!  I was so glad my husband was so loyal and loving...I was truly blessed! Are you kidding me???

We had this awesome life in this little town.  We had lots of friends, went to the lake, the river, entertained.  What I never noticed was that my husband seemed to be closer to our female friends than their husbands.  All of them wanted a guy like mine.  He was the best!  I saw him flirt with women but I was so confident and secure in our marriage it didn't bother me. Except one.  She worked with him and would follow him around
constantly.  They were in the office together alone for the first 3 hours of everyday.  He would make fun of her about how 'dumb' she was and no work ethic and how lazy she was.  BUT...she was having marital problems so he was there for her....  There were a couple of others that concerned me more because of how he talked about her.  I told him she was after him and he just blew me off....He even had her house sit our home for us while we were on vacation.

I started to get concerned about my husbands health. He had started to loose a ton of weight and just didn't seem himself.  Cancer runs through both sides of his family.  I couldn't get him to see a doctor.

I remember going to the river with a girlfriend and I was sharing my concerns with her.  I told her I was really worried.  I just knew one thing....HE WASN'T HAVING AN AFFAIR!  This I knew with certainty because I just knew how much he adored me!  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????